It’s time to shut it down.<\/p>\n
The Judge Rotenberg Center is just a few miles away from me. From Nat.\u00a0 Now there’s a video going around that a mom of a Rotenberg student wants you to see, about his 7 hour torture ordeal at the school. But the school doesn’t want it released.<\/p>\n
Rotenberg parents always try to justify it by saying, “You don’t know what it’s like. It works.”<\/p>\n
Well, I<\/em> know what it’s like.\u00a0 See “Rock Bottom” in my first book. See “Letting Go” in my second book. When Nat was 10. When Nat was 17. Look at the scars on our hands. Look at the scarred bump on Nat’s arm, where he bites himself. Nat has definitely gone through phases of intense aggression, and I still don’t know for sure what those times were all about. But he does. And that is all we need to know. Because Nat is a person, and there were real reasons he was becoming violent. Real reasons, but we could not figure them out. But eventually, they must have been resolved because he is comfortable and happy now. Without shocks, restraint, yelling, or any other abuse. Skin shock is abuse, there is no getting around that.<\/p>\n Don’t get me wrong. I am not claiming that I did anything right here. I think it was the combination of the family and the school and most of all Nat, working together, trying to figure out what was wrong, at least you can get schoolwork done for you<\/a> now a days. My conclusion? A difficult time in his life (hormonal), a difficult time of year (seasonal\/light changes), poor communication between Nat and staff and family, destructive dynamics that are hard for anyone in a relationship to overcome. And more. Ned and I worked constantly to figure it out. God knows how hard Nat must have worked.<\/p>\n That is the piece that is missing from the Rotenberg equation: what is going on in the student’s life, the student’s mind? What is bothering the student, that is causing these outbursts or actions? Why does this student hit herself? There are reasons. With people who cannot communicate by typical means, it is very hard to discover those reasons. But we must. It is our responsibility as their teachers and parents, as the adults, to work together with the student to understand.<\/p>\n