{"id":9,"date":"2010-03-22T06:27:00","date_gmt":"2010-03-22T06:27:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/susansenator.com\/blog2\/2010\/03\/excerpt-eight-from-amsg\/"},"modified":"2010-03-22T06:27:00","modified_gmt":"2010-03-22T06:27:00","slug":"excerpt-eight-from-amsg","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/susansenator.com\/blog\/2010\/03\/excerpt-eight-from-amsg\/","title":{"rendered":"Excerpt Eight from AMSG"},"content":{"rendered":"

My book, the Autism Mom’s Survival Guide: Creating a Balanced and Happy Life While Raising a Child With Autism<\/span> will be out in stores a week from today (or tomorrow).<\/p>\n

Chapter 8: Looking Toward the Future<\/p>\n

…Jane, a kindred spirit in Milwaukee, is way ahead of me.
Her son, Chris, is thirty-three. \u201cMy son has been working
at Barnes and Noble and living in an adult family home
in the community for eleven years,\u201d she wrote me. \u201cI still
suffer from separation anxiety and miss him every day
(even though I do see him every weekend). I can tell you
that I still do not know if this is the course he would have
chosen for himself. He does not verbally indicate whether
he is happy or not (he has limited speech). We judge his
well-being via his behavior.\u201d This has always been our
modus operandi with Nat, who so often cannot or does
not express what is going on inside.<\/p>\n

Jane impressed me with her positive attitude and her
ability to meet difficulties head-on, despite the challenges of
being a single mother. \u201cI was divorced when Chris was six or
seven years old,\u201d she told me. \u201cI really felt alone. I just wanted
to take care of my son and daughter. We all moved to Akron,
Ohio, because I had a stepsister there. It was great because we
had family; we had supports.\u201d<\/p>\n

The support of her stepsister enabled Jane to go back to
school and earn a degree that would help her get a good job.
After she finished her education, the three of them moved
back to Milwaukee and lived with Jane\u2019s parents while Jane
looked for a job. Jane feels she was so lucky to have been
able to do that, as opposed to feeling discouraged about
moving in with her parents. \u201cThose were the happiest days
of Chris\u2019s life,\u201d Jane said. Even now, twenty-six years later, he
points in the direction of her parents\u2019 old house when they
pass their old neighborhood. It is Jane\u2019s dream to buy her
parents\u2019 former home so that Chris can live in it again.<\/p>\n

Jane\u2019s strong sense of what is important and her ability to
stick with that has convinced her that advocacy is the key to an
autism family\u2019s happiness: advocacy for the child and for the
parent. \u201cI want more for him,\u201d she said simply. \u201cI want to build
a better world for him while he\u2019s alive.\u201d Doing that is a tall
order, but Jane has learned that facing the obstacles that come
up gives her such a feeling of accomplishment. \u201cYou have to
stay on top of all the tasks related to supporting Chris as an
adult in the world. It never ends. But it\u2019s the challenge of it
all that interests me,\u201d she said. \u201cIf you\u2019re negative, all the work
you\u2019ve accomplished will cave in. It is just that simple. Chris
can sense my attitude. It affects him in so many ways.\u201d And
being negative will affect you, the parent, as well.<\/p>\n

Jane also discovered the value of finding trustworthy
people who understand her child. One such person helped
Jane\u2019s son Chris to get the job he has had for eleven years at
Barnes & Noble. \u201cChris had a job at a public library,\u201d says
Jane. \u201cThere was a woman there who knew how to connect
with him. When this woman left the library to work at Barnes
and Nobel herself, she took Chris with her.\u201d Since then, she
has acted as a job coach and sometimes serves as a liaison
between Chris and the customers. But it is Chris\u2019s ability to
internalize the layout of the bookstore that has made him
the cherished employee he is today. \u201cHe knows just about
where every book is in the store,\u201d says Jane. \u201cHe helps customers.
He walks them to where their book is.\u201d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

My book, the Autism Mom’s Survival Guide: Creating a Balanced and Happy Life While Raising a Child With Autism will be out in stores a week from today (or tomorrow). Chapter 8: Looking Toward the Future …Jane, a kindred spirit in Milwaukee, is way ahead of me.Her son, Chris, is thirty-three. \u201cMy son has been […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-9","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/pSTth-9","jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/susansenator.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/9","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/susansenator.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/susansenator.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/susansenator.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/susansenator.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=9"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/susansenator.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/9\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/susansenator.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=9"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/susansenator.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=9"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/susansenator.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=9"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}