Oprah covered autism today, as she said, her “first time ever doing a show on this subject.”
Hmm, where has Ms. Winfrey been all this time? Didn’t she get the memo?<\/p>\n
1) If every twenty minutes a child is diagnosed with autism, is it time that we adjust our definition of “normal?”<\/p>\n
2) Why is it, when people speak on talk shows about autism, the emphasis always is on what the parents have had to give up, instead of what they have gained? As if we were all promised one particular kind of life. I understand that everyone has the right to feel bad, and complain, and grieve for the life they are not getting. God knows I do it often enough, no argument there. But it is also possible, over time, to move one’s focus, and reflect, instead, on how autism is the road given, and that there are no guarantees in this life. (See this Sunday’s April 8 Boston Globe Magazine<\/span> for more of my thoughts on this point.) And that this particular road is rife with potential, happiness, and growth.<\/p>\n 3) I wish I had never said to little Ben, five years ago, that Nat’s “brain is broken,” in order to explain autism. I heard it on television just now. “His brain is messed up,” said only sibling about his autistic brother. Why is there so little thought given to “different wiring,” and acceptance? Is it that our society is so hellbent on everyone fitting in and being perfect? Every kid is gifted, every kid is high-functioning, every family is trying to keep up with the Joneses, and so when something overtly different comes along, it feels like lives are coming to an end. I really believe there is too much emphasis on everyone being the same. If you are a boy and you don’t play sports, you’re a nerd. If you’re a girl and you don’t like pink, you’re a tomboy. If you’re a boy and you do like pink, you’re gay. Everyone is so quick to sum up and dismiss. Autism and quirkiness become just another way to sum up and dismiss: “Lost Cause.” “Weird kid.” “In his own world.” “Tragedy.”<\/p>\n 4) The “Can you just…” part of the show was excellent. Parents talking about how others judge them for their kids’ behavior. Why are we all so f***ing judgmental of each other? I actually loved hearing Alison Tepper Singer advise the public to say simply, “Do you need help?” Rather than scorn and scowl at us. Difference is so hard for us to see and tolerate. But you know what? Tolerating difference is supposed to be the American way, although certainly every single different group (immigrants, blacks, women) has had to fight for their rights. So now it is the auties’ turn!!! So get<\/span> with it, America!<\/p>\n <\/span>5) What is amazing to me is that sooooooo many families are getting home therapies and supports, across the country! Things have improved in that regard since Natty was little and there were few providers anywhere. With the exception of what the May Center provided when he was 5, I had to make it all up, hire college girls and train them the way I saw fit!<\/p>\n 6) Early Intervention again! Quit hocking me<\/a> with the Early Intervention! <\/a> Just do this early enough and your kid will be mainstreamed! Oh Joy! The Mainstream Classroom is the new Promised Land. But then you go neurotic trying to intervene enough and correctly. And if your kid does not get mainstreamed, did you fail? Did he? How does one interpret success and failure here? Nat is living proof that you don’t need to worry so much about a kid not getting help “in time.”<\/p>\n 7) I like the way the show ended with every single parent talking about the gifts their autistic children have given them! “He has made me more spiritual,” “He has made me look outside of myself,” “He takes people just as they are.” “He has given me someone to love way beyond what I ever thought possible.” Amen.<\/p>\n 8) <\/span> I watched the show with Nat — ironic, eh? — and wondered what he thought of it. I said “Do you know what autism is?” He said, “Yes.” I told him he had autism, and that that was fine. And later, at one point I said that I love him, I smiled at him, and said, “It’s not bad like that, Nat.” He smiled back at me.<\/p>\n I give her a B. I think she tried to emphasize hope and good efforts, she tried to steer clear of the cause controversies, and she did not go for too much melodrama. The B is because she had no examples of older kids and no autistic people as guests. Not sure what Nat thought, but he is still sitting in there looking happy. <\/p>\n <\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Oprah covered autism today, as she said, her “first time ever doing a show on this subject.”Hmm, where has Ms. Winfrey been all this time? Didn’t she get the memo? 1) If every twenty minutes a child is diagnosed with autism, is it time that we adjust our definition of “normal?” 2) Why is it, […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-975","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/pSTth-fJ","jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/susansenator.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/975","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/susansenator.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/susansenator.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/susansenator.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/susansenator.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=975"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/susansenator.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/975\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/susansenator.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=975"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/susansenator.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=975"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/susansenator.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=975"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}
<\/span><\/p>\n