I love Halloween, but there are things about Halloween as an adult that I do not love.
1) Colored spider web: why?? All it does is look messy. Spider web on your house and shrubs should be white, so that it looks like spider web, not as if the spider has been drinking the Koolaid.
2) Boring Jack O’Lanterns: why not take the time to carve something original, personal to you? The triangle eyes and sawtooth mouth is so passe. We’ve done Homestar, Cyan Worlds logo, Spongebob, Harry Potter and the Snitch, polka dots.
3) The bowl of candy without a proprietor. Makes my heart sink when I think of how the kids will take advantage of it, even with your friendly, “Take one, please,” sign
4) The kids who take more than one from the bowl of candy without a proprietor
5) Kids who double-dip, who come back even after you’ve given them three mini Snickers!
6) Houses with no decorations, no lights on. How hard is it to hang up a few pumpkin lights, carve out a pumpkin (creatively), stick a candle in it, and open your door to mini monsters?
7) Psychos who may or may not have spiked our candy with razor blades, making me permanently paranoid, have to inspect every single piece before Nat, Max or Ben quickly gobble it.
8) The fact that parents aren’t really supposed to dress up in a costume. (Guess what I plan to wear, however?)
9) Buying too much candy — D’oh!!!
10) Buying too little candy — Argh!!
11) Teenagers who don’t even bother to wear a costume
12) The fact that candy tastes so good and makes you fat and unhealthy and ill
13) I have no girls, so no pretty costumes for me to make, only stuff like Zorro, Aladdin, Jawa, Met tool, Bag of Candy, frog. Not that there’s anything wrong with it.
14) Stupid doorbell night/mischief; never liked it, never did it. Hate cleaning up wet toilet paper from a shrub, or trying to remove “F***” from a doorstep (happened when I was a kid, felt sorry for Mom and Dad).
15) November 1st is so depressing — apres trick-or-treat, what’s coming? Shorter days, no leaves, hunkering down for the cold weather.
9 comments
You forgot parents going door to door with a one month old infant dressed as a pea. Sure, the kid is adorable, but is she going to be gumming that Twix??
To make you feel better on the pumpkins: http://blog.familyfrisch.com/index.php?itemid=360
The boys get to pick – and they come up with some intersting things. But Ry really just wanted a scarey face this year. Last year I made a Spider – that was wicked cool!!!
i hate storebought costumes.
“wow! that plastic hulk costume makes you look…um, exactly like a five year old wearing green plastic.”
what happened to face paint and costumes out of funky dress up stuff bought at a resale shop?
I have 3 daughters, and only the youngest wants to be anything pretty. I have made skunk costumes, pterodactyls, etc, but this year I’ve made a flower fairy. Having girls is no guarantee they will be girly-girls (especially when 2 are ASD).
I cannot creatively carve pumpkins, alas, I am not a gifted carver. I try to do cute faces though. And I like my fake spider webs, thank you very much. š
We can’t dress up our kid (he’s scared of costumes), so we dress up the dog instead.
a few more:
Dressing up tp hand out candy, and having NO kids show up
Having parents accompanying the kid lecture you on how disgusting the barfing pumpkin is (yeah…thats the idea…)
Having a kid who DOES come to the door run away screaming because the social cat happens to be 100% black…
Intervening when 2 teenagers bigger than me try to steal candy from little kids on my property (when said black cat and a set of black feathered wings actually comes in handy. looks fearsome).
November boring???? You haven’t seen http://www.nanowrimo.org yet have you???
November is my busiest month ever!
I am slowly learning to loathe Hallowe’en. It’s fake, and people are too scared of everything to bother letting their kids go trick or treating.
Poor kids.
For what it is worth I think Halloween is evil.
Particularly evil is the way that the supermarkets fill themselves with cheap trash the way they never used to in my childhood, sell it and then it all ends up in the bin a few days later.
What kind of celebration is that which wantonly destroys the earths non renewable resources in the name of a quick profit they could easily do without.
I think any true Pagan let alone Christians would be ashamed of that.
Great article. Will be adding this site to my bookmark for future references. Keep up the good work š