Susan Senator

The first time ever I saw your face I thought the sun rose in your eyes. –Roberta Flack

It’s Nat’s birthday. He’s practically dancing around the livingroom floor, giggles in his voice, right arm punctuating his words. I’m warm and comfy, on my favorite couch, covered in the lilac afghan. About to get coffee #2. Trying to wash the Nyquil taste out of my mouth with coffee. Watching “Beach Party At Disney World,” with Nat. He is especially taken with the Beach Boys’ number “Surfin’ Safari.” When it started, he stopped his JHS and covered his eyes, smiling. He looks like a cucumber, wearing green sweats and a green shirt. It is just so lovely sitting here with him on his 19th birthday.

I’m of course remembering that morning. It was the third day of false labor, and no sleep. I called Mom to complain, and she said, “Call your doctor.” She couldn’t stand to wait for this baby any more than I could! I called Dr. Lichter, no longer my doctor, and he said, “Okay, let’s have a baby.” I was so relieved, and in my nube Mom mind, I was going to have my new baby imminently! Of course, it wasn’t for 12 more hours before I would get to see that shana punum, the “ball with a face painted on it,” as Ned called him.

Newborn Nat was like a plucked chicken, but we could all tell that his face was perfection, and it looked like he had red hair.

We have a moonbounce due to arrive sometime this morning, and (I think) my parents are coming. We moved the party to tomorrow because today is supposed to be mostly rainy, but it looks pretty good right now. In preparation for Nat’s birthday today, Ben, Nat and I baked the cake. That’s just for today; if we still have the actual party tomorrow (Sunday), then we have to bake another cake for that, for when all his friends are here. We decided on Parks and Rec van cake; that’s the navy blue bus that his Social Group takes on their trips. Mallomar wheels and Lego Social Group members. Hershey bars for the road. So it’s going to be two cake boxes’ worth of cake: one to go into two loaf pans for the van, and one flat cake for the road. It’s probably way too much cake.

For presents I’ve bought: 2 VHS Disney videos (Nat prefers old media): Fox and the Hound, and the one where Billy Joel sings, I can’t remember it right now, with the dogs; a huge pepper grinder (he loves grinding pepper); and a huge Reeses peanut butter cup-shaped pillow! Max and Ben are burning him a CD of songs they like, and we’ll also have pancakes and bacon for breakfast.

On my boys’ birthdays I always like to think about how they began, what each of their labor and deliveries were like. I love thinking about the Before and After of My Boys, remembering what life was like before they came into my life, and then the first moment I saw their faces. Nat’s beginning was special in so many ways, and the very first one we were aware of was our transformation from couple to family. Happy Birthday, Sweet Guy! Here’s to you!

(taken when Nat was 2 mos. old, at Laura and John’s wedding!)