Susan Senator

I’ve been so down about Nat, but late last night Ned and I realized that no matter where this strange new behavior is coming from — I mean the spitty laughing — we should be helping him learn to regulate himself, not just feel helpless and sad. Ned said, “Nat, remember, you like to get ice cream and you can only do that when you’re feeling calm,” and Nat stops and says, “Get ice cream.” And he’s lucid again.

So we are going to try using our leverage to show him that he *can* control himself.  That is what it’s like living with my darling Ned. He does not often despair. He doesn’t read into things or draw long dark conclusions. He lives within what is happening, and bears it as the thing that’s happening now.

I am so lucky that Ned is Nat’s father. He is so wise and seems to have infinite patience –with all of us. And he is very generous, offering me his shoulder to nap against.