Susan Senator

Workin’ on the night moves
Tryin’ to lose them awkward [midlife] blues
Workin’ on the night moves
In the summertime
Sweet summertime.
–Bob Seger, with a little help from me

A new experience tonight. I wanted to extend the day, it was just so beautiful. I needed to be outside. I craved that warm night air. And I wanted to dance. The zills were in my head again. It’s been a while since they were really in my head.

So Ned said I should dance outside. Isn’t that kinda crazy? I asked. No, it’s not, said Ned. He keeps urging me to find what’s fun and just do it. What will the neighbors think? I said. What will they think? he asked. Who cares? I could feel it surging up inside me, a forbidden thing that I really wanted to do, like skinny dipping. I’ve only done that a few times, and that is not enough in one lifetime.

So I danced outside, under the stars. I took a pink veil and a red hipscarf, and tied it around my shorts. I had my zills, and the iPod, and just let the music move me. Sometimes a breeze would lift my veil and carry it behind me. There were faint scents of blossoms because the night air was warm and moist. I was flying, spinning, swaying, and my fingers were clicking away like little crickets. I felt light and lifted, like the air itself, dark and mysterious. I felt like a gypsy girl, wild and free. Breathless, exhilarated, awed. Happy.