Susan's Blog

Friday, January 23, 2009

Not Afraid

As God is my witness, I’ll never go quietly…
–Scarlett and me

I went to a meeting last night. One of those information-filled evenings for parents, the subject being “Understanding the Disability Housing Maze” or something like that. It was presented by Combined Jewish Philanthropies (CJP), my new heroes. CJP has given tons of money in Massachusetts to help set up homes for disabled people, really nice ones.

The problem, of course, is the state bureaucracy and really, at the very bottom, the lack of money in this country for the disabled adults. The waiting list for housing vouchers is 7 years. And that’s if you are savvy enough to apply for your kid in time! I am going to apply for Nat on Monday. So much to do. Thirty applications for this and that.

But I am going to do, Goddammit. No more sinking down, no more fear. Bureaucracy, Shmureaucracy.

There are all sorts of things I need to learn, and last night I started the process. One huge thing I learned was to stretch my kid as much as possible, building up his independent living skills as much as possible so that he needs less from the state. Stretch your kid. It gave me a sense of power and strength, not a feeling of depression. I am going to push my Nat and believe in him, and be strong and get him a full life. I look at his joyful face as he has just finished his sing-along (“I Love To Laugh;” how apt for him). He deserves the sun and the moon, in my book. I am at least going to get him a job coach and happy place to live.


hip hip hooray! I am so happy to hear that you are feeling so much better about Nat living on his on. I also will start the process for my Punkin this year for independent living, as you mentioned the waiting list is so long. I’m scared but we at least have to give it try. Your twin in Alabama

— added by Anonymous on Friday, January 23, 2009 at 5:17 pm

You know it, Twin! I was really surprised to see how energized I was feeling; I was expecting to need to lie down over all of it! I did like five things on my list today!! Have a great weekend.

— added by Susan Senator on Friday, January 23, 2009 at 6:35 pm

I love the way that you say ‘Stretch my kid’ rather than ‘push him’. There is a very fine line between fear and excitement.I am thinking that this process of lettting kids grow into their adult lives must cross back and forth over that line fequently.

— added by Sue on Saturday, January 24, 2009 at 2:43 am

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